Sunday, 18 April 2010

Allowing criminals to do-good.


Just below accidentally eating my own head in 'things i don't ever want to have to deal with in my short and futile existence'; is do-gooders. Well aren't they just a cunch of bunts. For people who strive for making life happier, better and more equal for others, they do a spectacular job at making me woefully unhappy. There are two types of do-gooder.

The first seem to be fairly easy to categorise, but more importantly spot; on clocking group of them heading in your direction, you'll almost certainly wish to hurl your self into the nearest shrubbery. The common 'category one' do-gooder is very much similar to the common church-goer. The boredom just oozes out of every aspect of their life. Their grey clothing, their lego-man like hair cuts, 'would you like tea or coffee?', 'just water thanks'. I gnaw violently on my fist at the thought of the conversation at the dinner table, or in the car, what do they talk about! Category one is a dangerous category in that a normal person, dropped into this life of cardboard-eating greyness, runs the risk of biting their own legs off in desperation. These are the kind responsible for the constant murdering, raping and general debauchery we see in society. Not them personally obviously, they couldn't wipe their own arses with out being offended, but their constant christian line of thinking; 'treat others as you would like to be treated'.

This has resulted in a state that once hung-drew and quartered people being watered down, to almost homeopathic levels, and that now gives an 8 year sentence for a fatal, 37 wound stabbing. Oh you bastards. Why are these psychopaths, that are clearly no good for society and are beyond mental rehabilitation not being either indefinitely locked away or alternatively given the death sentence. 'Well they are still a person', No! the minute the other persons life was taken in cold blood, he stopped being a rational minded person. Also it is a fallacy that we instantly become 'their level' if we killed them in the name of justice. It is not to be compared. It is not as if i am suggesting we hang innocent people for looking at us funny, only then would it be comparable.

I'm sure it is all well and good for a do-gooder to stand there and spout flowery bollocks about how we all do wrong and how we should forgive, up until the point where it is their husband being mutilated and spread up the walls, or his wife being brutally raped with a foot up her arse. We shouldn't lock him away for ever and the death penalty is completely out of the question? Ok, this repeat offending, hammer wielding nutcase will be living with you from now on.... i wouldn't look him in the eyes mind, that's when he starts trying to eat people...

It is only fair that those who don't want to see a return of the death penalty fund for the institutions in which we can safely install these no-good loonies, and stop just expecting the prison system to replicate like bacteria and for institutions just to fabricate out of nothingness.

Category two are the younger, Che Guevara-esque arsemonkeys that 'fight for rights' in a manner that is so hypocritical, every time it is exhibited, it gives me the knee-jerk reaction of very almost blowing my arsehole out in an unstoppable wave of fecal artillery. These are the ones responsible of campaigning against the making of armaments, on the grounds they cause harm, by violently attacking precautionary police. These are the band of wank-each-other-off brothers that campaign against animal cruelty by vandalising a persons house and using arson. As you can see in both cases, these unhinged, revolutionary minded psychopaths display irrational hypocrisy to get their all important 'message' out there. Do they have a message? Or are they just looking for a fight... It seems to me that these younger do-gooders are not do-gooders at all; they are hate-inciting, shoulder-chipped maniacs, looking for an excuse to be violent but not brought down.

When the British empire (the finest and most expansive seen by the world) was at it's peak, the policy was to send criminals abroad, even for thieving...to the front line. Well it is clear then what we should be doing! Stop qualifying teenagers as professional arseholes with ASBOs and ship them out to the front line. I suppose there is a problem in arming these already unstable, misbehaving youths with guns. Then we arm them with an assortment of rudimentary weaponry; swords, spears we can create a table-reversed Rawks Drift. Fuck it, you category two do-gooders can go with them as you're always looking for a fight! In fact anyone caught displaying testosterone filled violence in Britain can be shipped eastward to fight the front line war and show how hard they really are.... I'll sit here and watch your balls shrink and you plead for a weapon more substantial than a cocktail stick...or a ticket home. The Jeremy Kyle show can convert effortlessly into a recruiting service and no longer will our forces be suffering the drought. Crime rates would plummet because offenders are being shipped out to the east and potential offenders would begin to reconsider their actions, whilst all the while our gains in the middle east would be more fruitful than ever.

So we won't return to the death penalty, and our prison system is clogging like Johnny Vegas' arteries? Fine. The elite unit for special operations in the middle east can be made up of our finest, most insane repeat offending psychos. Apart from getting them out of our country and leaving us all the safer for it, i see two benefits. One, we are allowing them to reach their pinnacle, to fulfill their life's purpose for we are allowing them to do what they do best; murdering. And two, imagine the fear that would be installed into the enemy when they see the corpses of their comrades being eaten and their entrails thrown about by ' Psycho squadron'.... we'd be left with no opposition come Christmas 2010.

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